...not notice the world of autumn

This has always been my MOST favorite season of the year. It has been a while since I've written. The main reason is because I knew it would be about Autumn, and quite frankly, it didn't feel like it at all! How can you write about something that you can't connect with just yet? Well, the time has drawn near, and I have yellow leaves outside my door falling to the ground...just a few a day. The rain has kissed my neck of the woods on the earth, and the smells of blooming flowers and growing bushes come out even more. A friend of mine who grew up on a reservation shares her stories of eating the earth after a rainfall. I always enjoy hearing her talk about it because there is something to weather that brings pleasantries, isn't there?

You know that you know that you know the seasons are changing. You can sense it. The rain and breezes in Autumn are not the same as the rain in the summer or spring seasons. There's something about this season that brings warmth and healing and coziness to one's heart. Is it the fact that we watch nature move in alignment with Heaven as it blows in our face a coolness that gives us just a bit of a chill? Maybe it's because now we have a legitimate reason for drinking a hot cup of cocoa every single day, and then some. One of my favorite reasons for this particular season is that I get to pull out my coats, sweaters, scarves, and gloves to snuggle in!

I love this season because it brings us closer to celebrating the birth of our Creator, who spun not only us into being, but threw out the stars one by one that seem easier to spot on those colder nights. It's kind of fun to play a guessing game with the sunset and try to figure out just when exactly that sun will go down...will I have enough time to go for my jog when I get home from work, or will I be "forced" to stay in and relax while I'm simply covered with a blanket on my couch? There's an excitement that Autumn brings my way. Many people feel a rejuvenation when it's Spring, but I get it from harvest time. It's a reprieve. It's a welcome friend who has been on a long vacation, and is back to share new stories of adventure.

NEXT WEEK: Go where you can go, see what you can see

...not love with all you have

The older I get, the more I see the urgency for love to permeate through the veins of societies. I say that in the plural form, not a singular "societY". Love commands, demands, yet yearns and yells at the same time. "Is anyone out there? Is anyone listening? Where can I go? Who will take me? Who will give me?", Love questions. Songs have been written over the course of past generations. They are being written now, somewhere, as you read this, and they will always be written on pages for others to be awakened. They are songs about love. What's the big deal about love when there is so much hate? I want love. I want to give love. I want to err on the side of love rather than hate. Who am I that I should withhold love? Is it withheld because I have been hurt? Tell me someone who has NOT been hurt one way or another, and then send them to me to reveal their secret. I do not have to be an unscratched faberge' egg in order to love the man standing next to me who smells like he really needs a bath. If anything, I must love him more because of my own scratches...that way he (or she) knows the love is real. Then, when he has known love from me, he can give it to someone else.

Shall I give love only to those closest to me, who share in my personal joys and friendship? Shall I only give love to my husband? Shall I only give love to my parents, pastor, or children? Who shall I give my love to? Everyone! Some people say, "Don't even give that person a second thought." For some reason, that comment makes me want to love "that person" even more. He who is without sin cast the first stone. Love is not just a warm fuzzy surging through my veins because it's my birthday and loved ones are showering me with wishes and hugs. Love is a choice. How can I NOT choose to love? I was not made for myself. We were not put on the earth to love ourselves. That is a very lonely place to be. That is a very boring place to be!

I look in the eyes of others who can't see beyond their own pasts and I see each one of them has a child inside STILL in need of love. I want to be someone who can bring a tinge of healing and joy to them. I see faces of those who have not gone through much drama in their lives, but have had very happy, cultured, well-established upbringings, and still there is a need. It happens more often than not. THEY must love. It is in giving that we receive. It is in pardoning that we are pardoned. It is in loving that we are loved.

I am greedy. Did I perk you up? I am GREEDY for love. I am filled more and more each day with a love I have never known, and I want more! I also want to give more. What if I die tonight? What if you die tonight? Anything can happen at any time in any way to anyone. That is the reality of life. Can you rest your head knowing you have loved with all that is in your being?

NEXT WEEK: My favorite season - Autumn!

...not be crafted in the art of being happy

I think happiness really is an art. Situations, incidents, events, etc., those things happen, and it's in those circumstances that happiness can be experienced...if you embrace them and learn from them. There is a quote I really love, and I don't remember the author of it, but nonetheless I'm sure he/she would prefer I remember the quote anyway. It goes like this: "Happiness is found when one stops looking for it." What a concept! Thonk my forehead, I coulda had a V8!! When I look back over the last 7 years of my life and when I think of my present life I see, first and foremost, the amazing hand of God, and I notice about myself that I am surrendering more and more each day. They are little steps (I can hear Bill Murray saying, "Baby steps, baby steps" in What About Bob?) that I take, but the older I get, the more I throw my hands up and say, "Okay!", and I continue walking forward. It is in THAT surrender that I feel the happiness grow a little more as time goes by. Why do I surrender? Why not?

I had entered a new school of life 7 years ago when my first marriage ended, and while it was the worst time of my life EVER, it was also the BEST time of my life. I had searched and searched so very hard for happiness in the life I had back then and when it was not around anymore, and when I realized that I had NO control over someone else's choices, however hurtful and out of line they were, I threw it all up in the air and said, "Okay!". I let go and I walked through whatever came my way. That was the beginning of a new road of life perspectives that truly mattered. It was a struggle along the way, don't get me wrong, BUT it has become a new road of faith. It has become a new road of love. It has become a new road of happiness. It has become a new road of joy. There will never be an end to struggles in this life on earth, but the difference between being swept away by them and being victorious over them lies in having faith in God and not only understanding, but EMBRACING the moments at hand. It is when we embrace the situations in our lives that we can gain happiness one moment at a time because we have surrendered, and when we have surrendered, then our hearts, eyes, ears, and minds are open to seeing what we should be seeing in the first place. This truth goes for any type of moment, positive or negative.

Haven't you ever heard people say to you that when you let it go, things work out? And not only do they work out (whether or not they worked out the way you thought they should have), but they work out better!! I'm not saying you have to go through something traumatic and big and heavy like an abandoned marriage in order to learn the art of being happy because certainly you don't. I commend you if you have little to no drama in your life and things always work out well for you. I know people like that. I genuinely say more power to you. But taking in the subtleties of life can teach you new lessons of happiness and joy all on their own. Letting go of the need to control everything (if you're willing to admit that you have that need) will most certainly bring freedom. Most of all, realizing and accepting the truth that God made you, and God doesn't make junk, will in and of itself bring a smile to your heart.



NEXT WEEK: Love with all you have

...be without clouds and other little things

Clouds...clouds...clouds...those mashed potatoes in the sky (that's what I have called them since I was little)...those floating cotton balls...they're absolutely wonderful. There is an organization called The Cloud Appreciation Society. You can go to their website and see different pictures of clouds. It's quite amazing, actually. Whenever we're fortunate enough to have weather where I live, I will always look up at the sky and watch the clouds. Don't you remember being a kid and watching them go by as they change formation? We've all seen dragons and angels and bunnies somehow. Many artists include them in their paintings. What is it about these spits of love that Heaven throws out to us? Why are so many intrigued by their power and subtleties? For me, they've always brought a feeling of excitement about life.

There was a movie way back when I was a kid that just set me over the moon and drove a stake of passion for the sky, and all that is in it, into my heart. "The Boy Who Could Fly" made me want to fly so bad! After seeing that movie, I would always go out to my backyard, sit in the grass, and watch the sun set with the clouds in prime fashion. What made them even more effective with me was feeling the wind blow. They're so ethereal. Rightly so, they're made by an intricate and surprising Maker. Who wouldn't fall in love with them?

Raindrops water us. They add growth metaphorically and literally. They bring out the best of pine trees - the smell! They wash the bird poop from our windshields and give us an extra boost of energy when we go jogging in their downpour. They help us save on our water bills by taking care of the grassy yard and flowers. They're quite versatile!

Post-it notes are one of the best inventions "since sliced bread". Post-its are platforms for subtle reminders - once you write it down, you take care of the task, you throw the post-it in the trash, you've gone about your business. Simplicity at its finest! Post-its can be used to prioritize items in a business meeting, to easily create a seating chart for a classroom, and to designate what pieces of furniture you might want to throw in the yard sale for when you move. I have tried using formal planners with their labeled sections so many times, and don't get me wrong, there are some really cute and very functional planners out there, but they just don't do it for me. And this is coming from someone who is VERY detailed and thrives on structure and order! Post-its are just easier. I usually have a nice little running pile stuck together that I stuff in my purse in a certain pocket. When I do that, I know that there are some important things I need to tend to, and they're right there, conveniently located so that I can just whip them out like James Bond whips out his pistol. Plus, they come in some really pretty colors.

NEXT WEEK: The art of being happy

...worry about how long your life will be

Key word: worry. With as many age-defying creams out there and "cosmic" elixirs that are sure to add years to our lives, what do we have to worry about? Is that where our fountain of youth is found? What if I told you there really is no fountain of youth, or more so that it's not found in forever creams and neon drinks? The bible says, "Grey hair is a crown of splendor, it is attained by a righteous life (Proverbs 16:31)" and "Remind me that my days are numbered (Psalm 39:4)". Would that make any impression on you about life? Would that grant you a different perspective about the kinds of choices you would make for yourself? I don't know about you, but there is a reason I am getting grey hairs on my head and wrinkles on my face, and I can guarantee it's not so that I can contribute to the insatiable feeding of the cosmetic industry. I am quite simply...living. I don't live in tomorrow anymore. I used to live in many fantasies about what I wanted for myself in my future. I used to live in my future. It was my escape from my present. I used to wonder how old I will be when I die, so that I can plan my days out before it happens.

The more I lived in my future, the less I lived in my present, and the less I lived in my present, the more I got away from reality, and the more I got away from reality...well, surely I missed something. I couldn't tell you what it might have been because I was too busy thinking about my future! I was sitting around waiting for my future to show up, when IN reality, the future did not and does not exist. Do you catch what I'm trying to say here? Worrying about how long your life will be only takes you out of the now because what are you thinking about? You are thinking about the future. I came across a quote that really made a light bulb turn on for me. It goes like this: "We must let go of the life we have planned so as to accept the one that is waiting for us". How simply profound. We have no control over tomorrow, that is, if we're fortunate to be given one. When it comes, what shall we do with it - wish we had yesterday back? Speaking for myself, I prefer to savor what is in front of me. Right now, it is one minute until one of my favorite food shows comes on, so I will sign off and enjoy it. Hey, I may get a great cooking tip!

NEXT WEEK: Clouds and other little things

...worry about broken dishes

I got this week's idea from a colleague of mine, and though I didn't get her reason why she came up with this in particular, I will venture to say that she meant life is too short to worry about something that won't keep us from falling apart ourselves. So why bother fretting over something that is replaceable? There is a deep connection people have to objects. Many people have great emotional ties to dishes, in particular. To be even more specific, many find deep meaning in plates because that is what they used for a special, pivotal event in their lives. They ate meals on their special plates when they had their parents over for dinner to announce a new pregnancy, or they ate off of their special plates because they joined together to comfort one another after the funeral of a loved one who died.

For whatever reason dishes are held in high regard to people, there is one underlying norm: identity and internal value is found in them. I had a set of blue plates that I bought myself and stored away a long time ago for when the day would come when I would live on my own. Since blue is my favorite color, the plates obviously spoke to me. The pattern was simple yet trendy, kind of like my own style and personality. I felt those plates really spoke of who I was and it somehow gave me some purpose and internal value because of what they represented to me. They were a symbol of freedom to come. Understandable enough, right? Of course. I was the one who picked them out, nobody else. I didn't have to check with anyone for approval. It was all me. It was fun. I looked at them many times over and just dreamed of me and my plates and the life we would have together someday.

When I finally did get my own place, the plates made their home in the cabinet. And that was it. It's not that I didn't like them anymore because I truly did, but they became a PART of something I had made for my life. THEY didn't make my life. They simply became a lovely thing upon which to eat food with people I loved. That's all. I don't even have those plates anymore, and I'm not really sure what happened to the whole set! I just know that they alone had no value, but what I did with them brought the meaning to my life - the experiences of sharing food and time with others.

I didn't pay a lot for them, I don't see the point in doing that. If one chooses to pay a lot for plates, I hope one understands that the value is not in the plates themselves, but for the reason they were made: holding food while you make those important connections with other human beings.

NEXT WEEK: How long your life will be

...miss the little things

Running around galavanting...feeling weighed down with circumstances and people's expectations...juggling daily responsibilities...all these things and more are norms of life. We do them or go through them, and when we're done with them, they're right back in our face. We can be like the little hamster on its wheel because it's so easy to be that little hamster. Where do all these things get us? Productivity is always good. Laughs are what we need to balance things out with the tears. We rush and run and rush and run and wait...we rush and run and rush and run and wait. What's on our mind when we go through that? I always find it funny when I see the person who speeds up and zips around the cars only to find him or her self stopped at the red traffic light just a few feet ahead - speeding up to stop.

In all of that, in all of the accomplishments of the day, in the rushing to the restaurants, etc, there may be things we miss if we don't actively look for them. We might miss getting ideas to better our selves and thus positively affect others if we're too busy trying to find out someone else's business. Any of us can die at any moment, on any given day, in any given way. Not to be morbid or pessimistic, but I'm a realist. Freak things happen all the time. We should never think we're indispensable for a moment. I want my life to count for something TODAY. If I'm fortunate enough to have another day be given to me, then I want my life to count for something then as well.

Truly, our days will hold more value and our lives will be more enriched if we pay more attention to the little things around us, and even in us (the still small voice). One morning I was jogging along an irrigated field at the local high school. All of a sudden, a dragonfly the size of a hummingbird was keeping pace with me by my side. It was the neatest thing. It didn't leave me for quite a while until I got close to the end of the field and then we parted ways. It looked like it was made of copper the way the sun was shining on it.

Do you ever watch the clouds? How about the good blessing of a front parking spot when you come around the corner? Watching a dog just lay there and pant - what's going through that little mind? Finding a $10 bill on the ground right in front of you at a busy waterpark with hundreds of people walking around you (that happened to me!)...always seeing a butterfly somewhere...seeing a little child act goofy just because that's who they are, not really trying to impress anyone, but just being themselves...being able to haggle down the price of something you really want...in my case, as a teacher, having a student who decides he wants to start reading the dictionary for fun (still makes my heart melt when I think about it, and 2 different students to top it off!)...

I could go on and on. Look for those little things. Give your attention to them and they will begin to reveal themselves to you more and more. They will bring you reprieve. They will fill you more than a full schedule.

NEXT WEEK: Broken dishes

...forget being free

Okay, last week I said I would write about the "little things" for this week, but as I was taking a shower this morning (I seem to do a lot of thinking there...more than usual...;D) I remembered that today is Independence Day. It is our formal reminder of the liberties we live with and in on a daily basis. It is a day when we can legally have fireworks, get to wear red, white, and blue clothing, and sing "God Bless America" or our National Anthem more than we normally do.

We get to buy "To Do List" magnetic note pads with stars/stripes on them, eat additional servings of hamburgers and hot dogs (extra burnt for me, please), and other than the heat luring us, enjoy more time in the pool. We are willing to park in a busy lot somewhere a mile down the road and walk the crowded sidewalk others are heading the same direction on in order to find the best spot possible to see a display of fireworks in a park or college field. We do it all so that we can be silenced...silenced in rememberance of why we're doing all I have mentioned in the first place.

We are being thankful and grateful for the ability to do those things amongst so many others because not only do we WANT to do them, but because we have the FREEDOM to do them. We sit silenced thanking God for not only the freedom He gives in our hearts, but for the freedom that so many people have fought to give us and still fight today to give us. There will be many who will continue to fight in the future for us as well.

Here's to those that lose somewhat of their own liberties in order to secure ours: THANKS a hundred-fold!!!

NEXT WEEK: The little things (for sure!)

...hold grudges!

Aside from my own perspectives about life being too short for things, I asked my family, friends, and colleagues for their thoughts. Today's particular issue is one I struggle with like many people do, but nonetheless, it is an issue that must be worked on and worked OUT, if you know what I mean. The quest to conquer grudges is like the Spartan trying to conquer Xerxes, however, in real life, by the grace of God, we can prevail over the grudges. Grudges do not go down without a hard, and sometimes long, fight.

Here's what some had to say about grudges:

"Being angry at someone for any length of time is harmful to you. It's just a waste of time. It's best to forgive and let go. Give that grudge, frustration, anger over to God. Let it go. When you start holding grudges you start some stinking thinking. You start making up little scenarios. You drive yourself nuts! Ya gotta move on. It's best to enjoy life."

"Life's too short to hold a grudge, resentment, or guilt. In fact, I would include anything that would be a weight or hindrance to becoming all that God has planned for you to be or accomplish."

"Life's too short to stay angry with anyone."

For someone like myself, who is very convicted about justice and who cares that people treat others the right way, it's very hard to just let things go because then it feels as though there is some kind of permission granted to those who are being hurtful. The truth is...that is NOT the truth.

By holding grudges we are imprisoning ourselves to our own hurt and anger. We must let go in order to live in the liberty we THINK we are gaining by tacking someone up on our mental, pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey wall.

NEXT WEEK: The little things...

...not eat cheese!

For those who cannot indulge themselves in this heavenly creation because it messes with your stomach, I'm sorry, but maybe you can just dream about it for the day. Considering I just had pizza for lunch with my family, I'm gassed up (pardon the pun - oh, sometimes I crack myself up!...) to discuss one of the luxuries of life - cheese.



There's nothing heavy about this post today (unless you decide to gorge yourself after reading this, but please don't do that), so incline your ear to me. Cheese is one of those comfort foods I always get excited about when the opportunity to eat it arises. If you think about it, cheese really does make everything taste better. There's macaroni and cheese, cheeseburgers, cheese fondues, nachos, cheese/fruit bites (eaten together), cheese/crackers, cheese/meat slices (eaten together), cheese on your pizza, cheese on my pizza, string cheese, cheese toast, cheese dips, cheese toppings, cheese balls...what else can I say? I'm sure you can add your own idea.



It's amazing that there are so many choices of cheese anywhere you go. Think about it, you will find cheese when you're on the road at the pull-off quick mart. You will find cheese danishes and bagels and cream cheese at a bakery. You will find a plethora of cheese in the deli section of your local grocery store, and the yummy gourmet types are usually in the refrigerated center case. Everywhere you look there's cheese! It's like the world is one big Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, but for cheese. Can you imagine floating down a creamy, lazy river of melted Brie while you're passing trees made of Parmegiano shavings that are gracefully falling to a ground made of chunky Gorgonzola? Oh, how I can only dream....



NEXT WEEK: Grudges

...worry about your pants getting stuck in your shoes

To enlighten you about this week's title: I have a particular pair of pants that I like to wear with a particular pair of shoes. The only thing about this partnership is that when I rise up from my seat, the pants end up getting stuck between the back of my shoes and my foot heels, so I always have to pull my pant legs out. Well, one day I was in a job interview wearing these pants and shoes. The time had come for us to wrap things up, and even though the interview went very well, I was feeling a little nervous still (who wouldn't?) and forgot to make sure I fixed my pants before getting up. All at the same time, the ladies started holding out their hands to shake mine and I was working on fixing my pants. I ended up shaking one lady's right hand with my left hand, all the while telling them that my pants were stuck in my shoes and trying to make light of it by giggling and my face was turning red from embarassment because I couldn't believe I was even experiencing all of that.

They chuckled with me about it a little (maybe for sympathy?....), but I didn't want to act like I had it all together, not fix my pants, and then have THAT be the last thing they remember seeing of me. It ended up being awkward no matter what. I called a friend to tell her how the interview went, and all I could focus on in speaking with her was my pants issue! I kept saying, "I'm such a dork, I'm such a dork!" She said, "If they really like you, they won't care about that. They will see past that to who you are really are, and how you will benefit them."

I know, "What IS the big deal? Those kinds of things happen to everyone." That is correct, and THAT is the point: it's NOT a big deal at all, but it overtook me and it was all I could think about. It was a true wardrobe malfunction, and what would make me so special to not have some silly thing like that happen to me?

When we get into situations that matter a lot to us, we want every little detail to work out perfectly...but every little detail does not always obey us. We have to be okay with that, and what's more...we need to focus on the TRUTH of the situation. For me, the TRUTH of the matter was that I had a great interview, and I actually ended up getting the job! Aren't you glad that pants and shoes can't determine the outcome of our lives? Ahh, the process of learning how to pick battles.

NEXT WEEK: CHEEEEEEEESE!!!

...not pay attention to those hurting

Given this is my first ever technologically advanced task to accomplish (blogging), I would say I am faring pretty well...at least, I think! Haha.... But in all seriousness, to the reason I have created a blog in the first place...discussing perspective:



Today and all of the yesterdays, and more than likely the tomorrows, there are people out there hurting. You may know some personally, you may be one going through pain for whatever reason. Think for a moment how much healing can come to those hurting if we give them the time of day. If we go to church and ask someone how he or she is doing and be on our merry way, not really taking the time to engage with that person, why bother asking in the first place? If we go to the grocery store and try to avoid the fellow shopper who can't stop talking about anything, what makes us think someone is going to listen to us when it's our turn to be chatty about which brand of cookies is the best, or how wonderfully cheap the milk is this week?



If we watch a little extra longer the faces of those around us wherever we land (gas station, hair salon, work, etc), and really seek out the ones who have the painful looks about them - whether they look mad, sad, scared, whatever - and take the time to show them some value by connecting with them in some simplistic or deep way... that may be the additive that contributes to their soup of wholeness.