Picture this: You're on a great, big ship. The ship is full of people and things and situations that have taken up all the waking moments of your life for a long time. They used to satisfy, fulfill, and make do. However, you start to realize that they're not working out so much anymore. You want more. You want more for yourself, more for your future. You've decided to chart new waters. You want to get off the ship, but realize the only way to get out to sea in search of a new land and new life is to lower the dingy, grab the oars, face the waters and just go. So you do...
Of course we have to be wise and not flippant about it. When we are in places in our lives that not only don't work out for us anymore, but become sorely unhealthy and almost poisonous, then it is time to get a move on. It doesn't matter the situation. We are placed on this earth to thrive, to live abundantly, to contribute to the health and growth and spiritual deepening of others as well. Am I saying life should be perfect...without challenges...unhurtful? Uhhh, no. That is a given. Jesus says that we will have trials and tribulations. He told us it was not going to be easy. We are human. We hurt ourselves and we hurt each other. There will always be sludge in life. BUT, we don't have to LIVE in it. We can see it for what it is (acceptance), we can face it head on (building courage), and we can walk through it while we search for truth and a better way (persistence).
The reason many stay put is because of fear. Fear of what others will think. Fear of "what if". Fear is at the root of all that holds us down and back. The beautiful thing about moving forward in spite of the "what if"s is just that - it's moving forward. The more forward we move, the farther away we get from all that taints our hearts. When we move forward from people or things or situations, we see the truth of what they were. We can learn what we need to learn from them, but leave it at that. When we move forward, we may end up walking alone or we may have company by our side, and how long will that company stay with us? Who knows. But ultimately, it's our lives to live. Move on.
Life is an adventure. Every day is an adventure. If we wake up, it's because God allowed us to have another opportunity to thrive, not just exist...to reach out, not just receive...there's nothing like lowering that dingy, and rowing on a prayer. It brings freedom.
NEXT: The love of a good man
Friday, October 28, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
...not have a dog
To have a dog in your life is like having a friend, a doctor, an exercise partner, a taste-"tester", a protector, and a child. I grew up with cats and little, hyper, yappy dogs that drove me nuts, but somehow those little dogs still left a soft spot in my heart all the days they were here with us as well as after they died. I loved my cats...A LOT. In our home, cats reigned supreme because we just loved them so much. We spoiled them like crazy, which I believe explains why they lasted so long in life. They cuddled with us, gave us little licks on our hands here and there. They were independent when we wanted them to be, and of course, they were independent when THEY wanted to be. Particularly the latter, wouldn't you say? The dogs, on the other hand, though loving alike, were always very dependent on us. They were more into their humans than our oftentimes snooty cats. I have realized more and more over the years that dogs seem to be nearly human themselves. I mean, come on, how many rescue cats do you see jumping out of a military plane or sniffing the ground for drugs? Dogs love and crave to BE loved. Why people use them for evil to gain money is BEYOND me, and all I know is we reap what we sow...and that's all I have to say about "those" people.....
How is a dog a friend? It's a companion, that special someone who enjoys our company just as much as we enjoy it's company. How can a dog be our doctor (in a way)? Put it this way, if you have a bug bite on your leg, then put some peanut butter (or some other kind of food that is healthy for the dog) on the bite and let the dog go to town licking it off. It's amazing how quickly that bite goes away! Also, haven't you heard of those stories about animal heroes? Dogs can sense when there's a sickness in your body. They can sense when a woman is pregnant. They know when you're sad AND happy.
They're an exercise partner for you whether you are hiking in the mountains or swimming in a pool. They're a taste-"tester" because where are they when you're cooking? Right at your feet, waiting for you to "drop" something! They protect their humans. They know how to treat their humans better than their humans know how to treat themselves.They're your children when you either don't have any, or in many cases, can't have any. Think about it (granted this is a well-trained "normal" dog): they poop where they're supposed to, they eat on schedule, they go to their bed when it's night time, you have to take them to the doctor for check-ups, they get baths, you can play with them, discipline them (in LOVE, please), and (oy vay...) you can dress them up. The nice thing about them being your child is they don't talk back! They'll do whatever it takes for our love. How can someone NOT want a dog?
NEXT: Moving on
How is a dog a friend? It's a companion, that special someone who enjoys our company just as much as we enjoy it's company. How can a dog be our doctor (in a way)? Put it this way, if you have a bug bite on your leg, then put some peanut butter (or some other kind of food that is healthy for the dog) on the bite and let the dog go to town licking it off. It's amazing how quickly that bite goes away! Also, haven't you heard of those stories about animal heroes? Dogs can sense when there's a sickness in your body. They can sense when a woman is pregnant. They know when you're sad AND happy.
They're an exercise partner for you whether you are hiking in the mountains or swimming in a pool. They're a taste-"tester" because where are they when you're cooking? Right at your feet, waiting for you to "drop" something! They protect their humans. They know how to treat their humans better than their humans know how to treat themselves.They're your children when you either don't have any, or in many cases, can't have any. Think about it (granted this is a well-trained "normal" dog): they poop where they're supposed to, they eat on schedule, they go to their bed when it's night time, you have to take them to the doctor for check-ups, they get baths, you can play with them, discipline them (in LOVE, please), and (oy vay...) you can dress them up. The nice thing about them being your child is they don't talk back! They'll do whatever it takes for our love. How can someone NOT want a dog?
NEXT: Moving on
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
...live without manners
There's something to be said about manners, don't you think? They're one of those aspects of our lives that is either active, dormant, or totally dead. I love a good show of chivalry - someone holding a door open for a person, saying "thank you" and "excuse me", even cracking a smile. Manners are not one of those old-fashioned traditions people used to live out when they walked around town with dresses up to their necks, and top hats and canes shouting, "Cheerio!" to their fellow streetwalkers. They have everything to do with respect. Don't we all want to be treated with respect? Don't we all want to be acknowledged that our presence matters? I would certainly hope we would all say yes.
Greetings aren't the only types of manners that hold value, but even (dare I say?) holding in what I like to call "gaseous vapors" at the dinner table. Now belches, on the other hand, are actually considered a gesture of respect in some countries. I don't know if I could go so far as to say that, myself. I'm not really into hearing or smelling someone's eau-du-toilette scent while I'm trying to enjoy my macaroni and cheese or a sweet indulgence of chocolate cake. Sound gross? That's because it is. That's where manners come in to play to save the day!! So let's focus on manners as being innate or cultural. More than likely they are cultural. My mom raised me to keep my elbows off the table when I ate. Being an adult now, I still remember her voice in my head telling me to put my elbows down and sit up straight when I'm eating (I will admit, I tend to fall off the wagon at times). They are good qualities to have, they're not nit-picky, just ways of showing self-respect and dignity. Manners do matter.
NEXT: Dogs
Greetings aren't the only types of manners that hold value, but even (dare I say?) holding in what I like to call "gaseous vapors" at the dinner table. Now belches, on the other hand, are actually considered a gesture of respect in some countries. I don't know if I could go so far as to say that, myself. I'm not really into hearing or smelling someone's eau-du-toilette scent while I'm trying to enjoy my macaroni and cheese or a sweet indulgence of chocolate cake. Sound gross? That's because it is. That's where manners come in to play to save the day!! So let's focus on manners as being innate or cultural. More than likely they are cultural. My mom raised me to keep my elbows off the table when I ate. Being an adult now, I still remember her voice in my head telling me to put my elbows down and sit up straight when I'm eating (I will admit, I tend to fall off the wagon at times). They are good qualities to have, they're not nit-picky, just ways of showing self-respect and dignity. Manners do matter.
NEXT: Dogs
Saturday, February 26, 2011
...miss the wind
I should have written this post a week ago when it was actually very windy outside. A funny take on my title since I literally missed writing about the wind ON the windy day! haha :) And it hasn't been very windy at all since then! Nevertheless, I am still able to write about it because it is one of the wonders of nature that ministers to me so very much. "How can someone miss the wind?" Easy...by focusing on the messy hair, the papers flying away, the leaves or seeds flying off of a tree and into one's eyes. There may be a statement made such as, "Oh that wind!", but it's purpose can be missed. The wind is that healing mechanism God sends our way to remind us that there is reprieve for the faint-hearted. The wind is all around us to envelope us and give us a sense of security...the security that we are alive, and not just simply alive, but alive with a purpose...just like the wind. When it is hot outside, what do we love more than a cool drink to quench us? We love that wind, that breeze that brushes our faces, blows back our hair to cool our scalp, and relaxes us.
We know a tempest blow can cause such destruction that there is no turning back. The mighty wind is to be respected. It is part of nature. It is totally out of our control, yet we think we try to control it by holding up an umbrella or our hand to block it. We see the effects of the wind, we feel them, and fortunately, we can even smell them at times. I absolutely love when gushes of wind blow around me, and the paralyzing scent of a blooming jasmine stops me in my track. I can't get enough of it. I have to keep sniffing the air...sniff after sniff. The wind is my friend then, don't you think? One of the best, simple pleasures in life is looking out the window and seeing trees sway, colorful leaves glistening in the sun, and the only way you can see the fullness of the glisten is because the wind is moving them!
Have you ever stood at the bottom of a tall aspen tree in Autumn and looked straight up? I have done that. It was the most amazing thing. I just stood there, watching these little hands of yellow dance wildly back and forth, all around because the wind was, in essence, the puppeteer. I remember being at youth camp long ago and our campground was in the mountains. There was a big field we had to hike up to, and it was vastly open. My friends and I laid down in the grass, and I felt the breeze come through the trees across the field. I watched clouds move by so fast. The combination of the wind and those clouds made me feel the closest to Heaven I have ever felt. That's the wind.
NEXT WEEK: Oh, the beauty of a life lived with manners
We know a tempest blow can cause such destruction that there is no turning back. The mighty wind is to be respected. It is part of nature. It is totally out of our control, yet we think we try to control it by holding up an umbrella or our hand to block it. We see the effects of the wind, we feel them, and fortunately, we can even smell them at times. I absolutely love when gushes of wind blow around me, and the paralyzing scent of a blooming jasmine stops me in my track. I can't get enough of it. I have to keep sniffing the air...sniff after sniff. The wind is my friend then, don't you think? One of the best, simple pleasures in life is looking out the window and seeing trees sway, colorful leaves glistening in the sun, and the only way you can see the fullness of the glisten is because the wind is moving them!
Have you ever stood at the bottom of a tall aspen tree in Autumn and looked straight up? I have done that. It was the most amazing thing. I just stood there, watching these little hands of yellow dance wildly back and forth, all around because the wind was, in essence, the puppeteer. I remember being at youth camp long ago and our campground was in the mountains. There was a big field we had to hike up to, and it was vastly open. My friends and I laid down in the grass, and I felt the breeze come through the trees across the field. I watched clouds move by so fast. The combination of the wind and those clouds made me feel the closest to Heaven I have ever felt. That's the wind.
NEXT WEEK: Oh, the beauty of a life lived with manners
Thursday, February 10, 2011
...deprive
Okay...this word can wear different cloaks. It can relate to food. It can relate to love. It has many different facets. Deprivation is that state of being that can cause a person to head one of two directions: within or without. There is no middle ground to it. If I deprive myself of small luxuries, I will personally get edgy, unsettled, and I will start to feel a slight imprisonment. That may sound a bit narcissistic, but nonetheless, it is reality.
I don't have much pocket change to live on, if you know what I mean, but there is no way I am going to deprive myself of buying a $7 handbag at the thrift store if I see one that just really gets my goat. This doesn't happen that often, but when the opportunity comes around, I take it. You gotta live life still. Surely, that's something more materialistic in the grand scheme of things, but I think I work hard enough in my days to enjoy those little indulgences. I don't deprive myself of the allowance. Nobody is put on this earth to just slave away and not be able to reap some kind of reward for their toil, however small. I must give myself grace and mercy to partake. It's okay. The same goes for food. Fat = flavor...ya gotta love butter. I'm not talking margarine...I'm talking real butter. Real sugar. Real cream. Too many people deprive themselves of those kinds of little luxuries. There is a fine line between indulging and savoring. Deprivation is not keeping us from indulging...it's keeping us from savoring. I say, "Go ahead...eat that tasty treat..." I like to say (and I mean this with all positive regard), "We're all gonna die someday...we might as well enjoy the food on the way out."
When it comes to other types of deprivation, I will just hone in on one, in particular...and it's heavy, but in my opinion, if a person is not dealing with something heavy in life, however small or big...well, is that person really experiencing the depth of life? I'm talking about being deprived of love. The entire world, past, present, and future, is longing and aching and screaming for love. Real love...the kind that bestows dignity and sanctity upon a human being. It's not easy being love-deprived. I have people in my life right now, in the past, and probably will have in the future, who are depriving me of love. These people are depriving me of relationship...it's hard, it's hurtful...so what do I do? Do I deprive them because they're depriving me? That's a big question to chew on. It's challenging to answer. Part of me wants to do that right back at 'em. But where would that get either of us? "Ticket to downtown Nowhere Fast"...that's where. We are placed on this earth to give the love that has been freely given to us. Nobody should be deprived of love. We all learn as we go. Don't deprive someone of knowing who you are. There's bound to be someone who is ready and willing to accept what we have to offer of ourselves...we're all people...we all have something within us that will enrich the life of another person...let it go.
NEXT WEEK: The wind
I don't have much pocket change to live on, if you know what I mean, but there is no way I am going to deprive myself of buying a $7 handbag at the thrift store if I see one that just really gets my goat. This doesn't happen that often, but when the opportunity comes around, I take it. You gotta live life still. Surely, that's something more materialistic in the grand scheme of things, but I think I work hard enough in my days to enjoy those little indulgences. I don't deprive myself of the allowance. Nobody is put on this earth to just slave away and not be able to reap some kind of reward for their toil, however small. I must give myself grace and mercy to partake. It's okay. The same goes for food. Fat = flavor...ya gotta love butter. I'm not talking margarine...I'm talking real butter. Real sugar. Real cream. Too many people deprive themselves of those kinds of little luxuries. There is a fine line between indulging and savoring. Deprivation is not keeping us from indulging...it's keeping us from savoring. I say, "Go ahead...eat that tasty treat..." I like to say (and I mean this with all positive regard), "We're all gonna die someday...we might as well enjoy the food on the way out."
When it comes to other types of deprivation, I will just hone in on one, in particular...and it's heavy, but in my opinion, if a person is not dealing with something heavy in life, however small or big...well, is that person really experiencing the depth of life? I'm talking about being deprived of love. The entire world, past, present, and future, is longing and aching and screaming for love. Real love...the kind that bestows dignity and sanctity upon a human being. It's not easy being love-deprived. I have people in my life right now, in the past, and probably will have in the future, who are depriving me of love. These people are depriving me of relationship...it's hard, it's hurtful...so what do I do? Do I deprive them because they're depriving me? That's a big question to chew on. It's challenging to answer. Part of me wants to do that right back at 'em. But where would that get either of us? "Ticket to downtown Nowhere Fast"...that's where. We are placed on this earth to give the love that has been freely given to us. Nobody should be deprived of love. We all learn as we go. Don't deprive someone of knowing who you are. There's bound to be someone who is ready and willing to accept what we have to offer of ourselves...we're all people...we all have something within us that will enrich the life of another person...let it go.
NEXT WEEK: The wind
Monday, January 24, 2011
... be rude
This is one of those topics that either makes you wiggle in your skin, or overlook it. Rudeness is not one of those warm fuzzy topics. People seem to only want to talk about the warm fuzzies. Well, I think it's very important to talk about rude things and the topic of rudeness because we live in a rude world!!!! It's reality (but reality can change) ......So how did those exclamation marks make you feel? I think my biggest question I have about the issue of rudeness is...WHY? Why be rude? Why must people be rude? Really, is it necessary in getting one's point across? If you think about it, that is why people are rude - to make a point. Whether the point is, "You're in my way", or "Why can't you see it from my perspective?", or "I'm higher than you", there is always a rude gesture, word, or nonverbal facial expression being sent out to all who live in the universe. One day, I was in the drive-through line placing my food order. I said my please and thank you as I always do. I get to the window, and the cashier told me he only charged me for a small drink as opposed to the medium-sized one that I ordered. He said it was strictly because I was nice to him. I thought that was pretty special. He went on to say that it was a nice thing to hear coming after the man in front of me who said, "You need to listen better".....Okay....really, dude...you had to say that to the man who probably works for peanuts, but may be so grateful he even has a job?
What would possess anybody to say something like that? What do people really get out of it? It's undignified. It's uncalled for, and quite frankly, it just turns others off to the "point" one is trying to make. When did we become so rude? Sometimes we have bad days, or we might get short in our speech on accident (I'm guilty of that, but I try to make it right when I realize I've done it). And again, I ask, WHY? Manners have no age. They are not "old-fashioned". They are needed. They are necessary. They matter. Being rude to others does not make one look tougher. In fact, being rude to others makes me look upon the rude person with pity. It makes the advocate in me rise up even more for the person who is the victim of the one who is being rude. Just be nice. If you're a man, hold the door open for a lady. If you're the lady, give a thank you. Sometimes, I actually hold the door open for a man. Why not? We could all stand to be chivalrous...men, women, children, dogs, and cats. Animals, too, you ask? Yep...I'll tell you some cats around my neighborhood could stand to use some manners and stop peeing in my planter...but I digress...
Rudeness comes from insecurity. It does not come from a place of inner strength and confidence. It is something that needs to be weeded from our bad daily habits and buried. Our perspective must change. Jesus gave the Golden Rule..."Love your neighbor as yourself" - love yourself, it's okay to do that...Stop playing video games in church and listen to the preacher man (or woman) because others are there to hear the spoken Word of God...Chew your gum quietly in the movie theater...Relax the brow on your face...Cover your mouth when you sneeze and cough...Let a little kid fill his/her cup up with a drink before you do - trust me, there is plenty in the fountain, you won't miss any, and if you do, then they'll make some more...Just smile at people and say hello - everyone should be treated with dignity, even if they might give you the wrong color of pen to write with than you would like...It's actually a very easy thing to do - kindness. Life is too short to be rude. It's not worth it, and in the end, the only point that is made is the point people make when they say, "What is wrong that person?"...
When I have had to confront students who were bullying other students, I have always said to them, "You're not better than anyone else...and nobody is better than you." I have made arguing kids face each other, tell each other sorry (and specify for what), shake hands, and then go and treat people the right way. They stopped messing with each other. That's the key...kindness...because we're all sharing the same earth...do the right thing. That is what's worth it.
NEXT WEEK: Deprivation....(the sound of it is not as bad as you think...)
What would possess anybody to say something like that? What do people really get out of it? It's undignified. It's uncalled for, and quite frankly, it just turns others off to the "point" one is trying to make. When did we become so rude? Sometimes we have bad days, or we might get short in our speech on accident (I'm guilty of that, but I try to make it right when I realize I've done it). And again, I ask, WHY? Manners have no age. They are not "old-fashioned". They are needed. They are necessary. They matter. Being rude to others does not make one look tougher. In fact, being rude to others makes me look upon the rude person with pity. It makes the advocate in me rise up even more for the person who is the victim of the one who is being rude. Just be nice. If you're a man, hold the door open for a lady. If you're the lady, give a thank you. Sometimes, I actually hold the door open for a man. Why not? We could all stand to be chivalrous...men, women, children, dogs, and cats. Animals, too, you ask? Yep...I'll tell you some cats around my neighborhood could stand to use some manners and stop peeing in my planter...but I digress...
Rudeness comes from insecurity. It does not come from a place of inner strength and confidence. It is something that needs to be weeded from our bad daily habits and buried. Our perspective must change. Jesus gave the Golden Rule..."Love your neighbor as yourself" - love yourself, it's okay to do that...Stop playing video games in church and listen to the preacher man (or woman) because others are there to hear the spoken Word of God...Chew your gum quietly in the movie theater...Relax the brow on your face...Cover your mouth when you sneeze and cough...Let a little kid fill his/her cup up with a drink before you do - trust me, there is plenty in the fountain, you won't miss any, and if you do, then they'll make some more...Just smile at people and say hello - everyone should be treated with dignity, even if they might give you the wrong color of pen to write with than you would like...It's actually a very easy thing to do - kindness. Life is too short to be rude. It's not worth it, and in the end, the only point that is made is the point people make when they say, "What is wrong that person?"...
When I have had to confront students who were bullying other students, I have always said to them, "You're not better than anyone else...and nobody is better than you." I have made arguing kids face each other, tell each other sorry (and specify for what), shake hands, and then go and treat people the right way. They stopped messing with each other. That's the key...kindness...because we're all sharing the same earth...do the right thing. That is what's worth it.
NEXT WEEK: Deprivation....(the sound of it is not as bad as you think...)
Saturday, January 8, 2011
...not go where you wanna go, do what you wanna do
The time is now. The time can not be "when I get the chance".... Why wait? What if the chance never comes because you've waited too long for it, and now there is no chance...because it's too late? That place is too far? You can't afford it right now? You're not good at something like that? When the kids grow up, then it might happen? Those are all understandable thoughts. Some of them are excuses, some of them are realities you simply can't get past... yet. So then what are you going to do about it? For me, the farthest I have ever traveled is the tippity top of the east coast. Great trip. Can't wait to do it again. For me, it's not far enough. I want to go EVERYWHERE. I didn't grow up with those opportunities. Many people grew up like me, many people didn't. Does that mean I was never meant to travel the world or have a talent birthed within me? Does that mean maybe I just haven't had the chance yet? I don't believe for one minute it was the former. We only get one life. I surely don't want to remain where I am now until I die. Do you? Some people like living and staying put in one place their entire lives. This post is obviously not written for them (no offense intended), but maybe they can humor me while I write about the rest of us - those of us that have buttons about to pop off our clothes because we need to get out and GO...DO....
Where do you want to go? What do you want to do? What are you doing about it right now? We have to make a plan and take it one step at a time, and we must give ourselves the leniency to unfold this plan over the next 1-3 years. It takes time saving money and drawing up the blueprints for big dreams to happen. It takes courage to keep walking toward them. I always tell my students, "If you truly want something bad enough, then you'll do whatever it takes to get it." I have to follow my own advice. I dream of indulging in pastries, cheese, and wine at authentic cafes in France. I want to ride my bike on the dirt roads in Italy, walk through fields of tall, green, swaying grass blades in Ireland, and be mesmerized by gothic structures in Prague. I want to go to countries and be knocked to my knees in humility (don't we all need that a little bit in our lives?) by lending my hands and heart to those in true dire need. On the other hand, I want to sell custom-made jewelry and make a great business out of it. I want to volunteer again in the neonatal nursery at a local hospital. At the very least, I want to be able to actually grow a plant to its fullness without killing it along the way.
Sure, some might say, "Keep dreamin', sister"...but you know what? Poopoo on that comment!! That's EXACTLY what I will do, and while I'm at it, start setting things in motion to make those dreams come true. It's all in the approach. How bad do I want it to happen? I can't wait any more. The urgency of those dreams is forcing me to act. Do you have dreams? Do you want to go somewhere, do something unique? Start putting things in order, however small those things might be because eventually they shall grow and become fruitful. The time is now.
NEXT WEEK: Rude (possibly Part 1)
Where do you want to go? What do you want to do? What are you doing about it right now? We have to make a plan and take it one step at a time, and we must give ourselves the leniency to unfold this plan over the next 1-3 years. It takes time saving money and drawing up the blueprints for big dreams to happen. It takes courage to keep walking toward them. I always tell my students, "If you truly want something bad enough, then you'll do whatever it takes to get it." I have to follow my own advice. I dream of indulging in pastries, cheese, and wine at authentic cafes in France. I want to ride my bike on the dirt roads in Italy, walk through fields of tall, green, swaying grass blades in Ireland, and be mesmerized by gothic structures in Prague. I want to go to countries and be knocked to my knees in humility (don't we all need that a little bit in our lives?) by lending my hands and heart to those in true dire need. On the other hand, I want to sell custom-made jewelry and make a great business out of it. I want to volunteer again in the neonatal nursery at a local hospital. At the very least, I want to be able to actually grow a plant to its fullness without killing it along the way.
Sure, some might say, "Keep dreamin', sister"...but you know what? Poopoo on that comment!! That's EXACTLY what I will do, and while I'm at it, start setting things in motion to make those dreams come true. It's all in the approach. How bad do I want it to happen? I can't wait any more. The urgency of those dreams is forcing me to act. Do you have dreams? Do you want to go somewhere, do something unique? Start putting things in order, however small those things might be because eventually they shall grow and become fruitful. The time is now.
NEXT WEEK: Rude (possibly Part 1)
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